No Lump Cocoa Trick

When you make cocoa from a mix, does it wind up with lumps of undissolved powder? Use this simple "trick" to ensure it turns out lump free.

I have been using this "trick" since I was a kid. It seems so simple and intuitive to me that I almost didn't post it... except... I have this friend. He's about ten years older than I am, highly educated, divorced and he was making cocoa as we talked on the phone one night. He paused our conversation for a few moments so that he could stir his cocoa and, after a few moments of vigorous clinking, he complained that his cocoa had lumps in it. His conclusion? The water he'd used wasn't hot enough.

Curious, I asked how he had prepared his cocoa. He answered that he'd followed the directions except that he'd microwaved his water in a mug instead of heating it on the stove. He then added a pre-measured packet of cocoa mix to the water and stirred very quickly (hence the vigorous clinking I'd heard), like you're supposed to do.

Years ago, I also used to get those unpleasant lumps of powder in my cocoa, however, they bothered me enough to troubleshoot a solution to the problem. Here's what I reasoned:

1. Cocoa mix AKA powder should not clump together if is pre-moistened. It should just dissolve.

2. It is much easier to moisten powder with a little bit of liquid than it is with a full cup of liquid all at once.

My solution was to start with my cocoa mix, then add a little bit of milk to it (nowadays, I prefer to use cream for a richer taste) and then stir those together till the lumps were gone before slowly stirring in my my scant cup of hot water and topping with whipped cream and a sprinkle of cinnamon. My cocoa came out smooth and creamy every time, without having to abuse the inside of my favorite mug.

It was a great solution and I felt ingenious for designing it, but now I need to laugh at myself a bit. Feel free to laugh with me if you like. Do you remember that I said I pulled out my brain and reasoned through a solution to this cocoa problem when I was young? I'm sure I was in my tweens or early teens at the time. Well, I have now accumulated a few more than half a century worth of years and I JUST read the actual directions on the back of a box of Swiss Miss (my favorite brand of cocoa). Guess what it says?

(Note that the directions on the box aren't numbered, but I have numbered them here.)

Preparation with 8 oz Water:

1. Place 3 tablespoons of cocoa mix into a cup.

2. Gradually stir 8 oz (1 cup) hot (not boiling) water into mix.

To heat water in microwave, place water in a microwave-safe container; heat on High power 1 minute or until hot (not boiling). (Directions developed using 1100 watt microwave oven).

So there we have it. For the past 40 years, I've thought myself very clever for having reasoned a solution in my youth to the all-important, life-altering, cocoa-lump problem when I could have just read and followed the directions instead. The lump-free cocoa directions were there on the packaging all along! It's a good thing God gave me a brain to use so that I can ignore directions and have something to do with my time.

What about you? Are you as genius as my friend and I are or did you actually figure out how to read the directions on a box of cocoa? How old were you when you found out the "trick" is to follow the directions? (I'm really just curious to know if I'm normal. I'm feeling a little bit stupid over this one.)